my awakening consciousness


Filed under: daylilies — waterlily at 2:29 pm on Saturday, February 7, 2015

Very down and exhausted today. It’s like life is totally colorless and flat….nothingness. Scared of food so took my diet pills…not helping. Have to work up energy to walk the dog. It’s all I can muster. I love her, she’s a good girl and a rescue poodle I’m fostering. She’s rescuing me too. All my food issues have come back lately and I had them so defeated for the last 3-4 years….now I’m back to really scared – terrified – of being fat. Down to 111 lb which I know is skeletal but still every time I eat, feel like I’m becoming obese….and I KNOW this is crazy! That’s it for today. I wish someone would read this and rescue me. God, that is so childish…